The Dark Side of Patriarchy 

Gracie Christensen

Throughout history, women have been forced into the male shadow and have been neither seen nor heard from. The patriarchal rule is that women are controlled by men, Beechey explains a basic understanding of patriarchy: “patriarchy has been used to refer to male domination and to the power relationships by which men dominate women” (p 1). What women do, what they say, who they say it to, and who hears it is controlled by men in our society. In “The Dark,” by Jess Walter, the women are the pushing force of the main character, Doug’s story. However, the women are rarely heard from and are silenced by Doug’s interpretation of the events, which manipulates the reader’s view of the women to what he believes is most important of their character. “The Dark” perpetuates a narrative where patriarchal values undermine women’s voices and autonomy, forcing them to be a muted presence that only exists to serve the male story.

The short story “The Dark” by Jess Walter goes over the dating life of Doug after his wife, Ellie, passes away from cancer a few years prior. The story contains flashbacks explaining what Doug thinks is important to share about Ellie’s life, such as dating advice, some high school drama, and events shortly before her death. The reader goes through two dates with Doug after the grief after Ellie and sees a man’s viewpoint of dating after loss. One of the dates happens to be one of Ellies former high school classmates, who she believed was her archenemy, Marcie.

Throughout the story, there are flashbacks to Ellie and Doug’s relationship dynamic and how Doug felt about some of the choices Ellie made, which almost always he did not agree with. In Ellies last week before death, she calls in a priest. The reason is unknown, but Doug took this as a personal attack against him instead of a choice Ellie made in terms of her own life. “Doug was overcome with shame, and a self-pitying anger rose in him.”(Walter, 2). Doug was not able to understand that Ellie was her own person going through a tough time and instead was angry that she did something that was not overseen by him and went against his morals. He then went on to question whether he knew his wife at all, reforming their life based on one singular incident because it was not his agenda. This downplay of his wife’s feelings and personal needs does not stop, though; he continues this when explaining that his wife thinks she has an archenemy, but he does not think this is true and thinks she should let the event go. Instead of trying to understand and support Ellie’s emotions within a traumatic event that she feels strongly about, he feels it is unimportant within their life and disregards her experience. These are some of the only bits the reader gets to know about Ellie from what Doug tells, and they are all negatives of her life. Debra Beck says, “The culture’s interpretation of history and its manufacture of debate, heroes, and prizes are in male hands” (p.5). Doug frames Ellie’s life as nothing more than the wrongs that she did to him or her life experiences he does not believe in, he has the power in the story to give her the recognition of her great life achievements but does the complete opposite. This is a way Doug continues to control the narrative so he has the light.

Women in a relationship where the man is at the top of the household should put the man’s needs over their own. “they should subordinate their own needs and interests to those of their part” (Heiss 1). This view from a patriarchal standpoint gives men a valid argument that women should always care about a man’s feelings and well-being over their own. Giving Doug the ability to rationalize his needs and wants as being more important than any other woman. While it is not said outright in the story, it is inferred that Ellie was a way for Doug to get emotional validation, emphasizing her role as something to use in his life instead of a person in herself. Doug gets validation through the story, and when he does not, he then misses Ellie. He first is constantly going to his son for validation about the dates he goes on, needing someone to confirm his views on what happened. Doug also gets upset when he makes a joke when his therapist does not laugh at his joke, then brings Ellie up wishing she was there because she would give him the validation he needs. When he goes on a date with the archenemy, he thinks the date is going great, while in reality, his date is about to walk out crying. He did not care about her emotions through the date or even how his wife would have felt about the date. He only cared that he was having a good time, and his emotions were high. As a man would, he expects the women to be a sideline to what he feels and puts his emotions over theirs and quiets their voice, so he is louder.

Doug not only uses his power as the narrator as a way to control the narrative but also uses it as a way to keep the women quiet in the story. The women are rarely heard from, and when they are, it is Doug’s rendition of the events. This is on par with the patriarchal viewpoint that a man is superior to a woman and controls what she talks about, in a more strict household. Doug stays with the views of a patriarchal household by making sure his needs are met before his wife, and he should be the one to make the decisions, as a man should be superior to his wife. Getting upset when she had the priest come over showed that he was upset when he was not in control of a situation as he should have been as the superior. Doug gives no recognition to Ellie for any achievements but instead makes sure she is only known for the negative, this also frames her identity within his, forcing her to be known only as attached to him and his feelings about her.

As a married woman reading this story from Jess Walter, it is clear that Jess either wrote the story as a feminist piece, shedding light on how some men view their marriage unknowingly, or as a clueless man who wrote a story of a man going on a date with a woman who was his wife’s archenemy. Doug, from the story, showed no love for his late wife, Ellie, even in past memories, he only remembered the dark sides of their marriage and her. It was sad to read that Ellie sounded to truly care for Doug’s happiness after she died and wanted him to find love, he could not care less about her wishes or advise. When I die I hope my husband only has good things to say about me and never talks about me like this if I do come up in a conversation. I hope this love never finds me.

In the story “The Dark,” the main character, Doug, quiets the women’s voices in the story by rationalizing his own wants and needs. Forcing the women in the story to be dismissed while also being the driving factor in the story. They are rarely heard, and their voices continue to be overshadowed by the man’s need to control the narrative. The women are suppressed to their use of a man’s story with no voice or story for themselves.

Works Cited

Beck, Debra Baker. “The ‘F’ Word: How the Media Frame Feminism.” NWSA Journal, vol. 10, no. 1, 1998, pp. 139–53. JSTOR, http://www.jstor.org/stable/4316558. Accessed 22 Nov. 2024.

Beechey, Veronica. “On Patriarchy.” Feminist Review, no. 3, 1979, pp. 66–82. JSTOR, https://doi.org/10.2307/1394710. Accessed 8 Dec. 2024.

Heiss, Jerold. “Gender and Romantic-Love Roles.” The Sociological Quarterly, vol. 32, no. 4, 1991, pp. 575–91. JSTOR, http://www.jstor.org/stable/4120904. Accessed 8 Dec. 2024.

Walter, Jess. “The Dark.” Ploughshares, vol. 49, no. 2, Summer 2023, pp. 160–69. EBSCOhost, https://doi-org.cwi.idm.oclc.org/10.1353/plo.2023.a902375.